The Old Miami Review & Bathroom Guide
Detroit, Michigan
The Shooki may be rough as hell. The bar absolutely is not. A Detroit time capsule, and the real thing. 1/10 for the restroom.
Source published September 2026
First-hand Shooki editorial
Shooki’s Review of The Old Miami
By Shooki · Source published September 2026
The Shooki may be rough as hell. The bar absolutely is not. A Detroit time capsule, and the real thing. 1/10 for the restroom.
Imagine it’s 1968.
You’ve just come home from Vietnam. Detroit is burning. The world outside feels like it’s coming apart.
So you duck into your neighborhood veterans bar, order something strong, find a stool, and try to make sense of it all.
That’s what walking into The Old Miami feels like.
A Detroit time capsule.
This isn’t a dive bar designed by somebody trying to make a dive bar.
It’s the real thing.
Veteran roots. Old memorabilia. Cheap drinks. Pool. TouchTunes. A bartender who might know half the room. And a crowd made up of the kind of Detroiters you actually want to meet.
I’ve been coming here for years.
And one of the greatest compliments I can give The Old Miami is this:
It hasn’t changed.
Thank God.
In the summer, that backyard becomes its own little universe. Drinks flowing. Music playing. Strangers talking. People from completely different walks of life somehow ending up at the same table.
The craic can get mighty.
Places like this force you out of your bubble.
You don’t come here to be seen.
You come here to participate.
Give this place a chance. Grab a drink. Put something on TouchTunes. Talk to somebody you normally wouldn’t.
You might accidentally have one of the best nights you’ve had in Detroit.
And to the gentleman who challenged me to pool…
Sorry again.
I honestly never play. 🎱
Best for
- A real Detroit dive bar with cheap drinks, pool and TouchTunes
- The backyard in summer
- Talking to somebody you normally wouldn’t
Less ideal for
- A clean, accessible or private restroom from this visit
- Restroom amenities beyond the bare minimum
The Shooki Bathroom Review
First-party restroom record · Source published September 2026
Restroom verdict
Not clean. Not accessible. Not private. Bare-minimum amenities. 1/10.
- Restroom inventory
- 1 reviewed area — 1 shared restroom area (designation unknown); total venue room count unknown
- Review coverage
- One shared restroom area was photographed and reviewed, with two visible urinals, a basin and one toilet area. Its gender designation was not established by signage, and the locking arrangement of the toilet enclosure was not confirmed. Other rooms and the venue-wide room and fixture counts are unknown.
- Room reviewed
- One shared restroom area from my visit; designation unconfirmed
- Accessibility status
- Unknown · Not clean, not accessible and not private describe my experience during this visit. Alternate access routes and accessibility compliance were not verified.
- Why this score
- 1/10. One of the lowest scores I can give. The Shooki may be rough as hell. The bar absolutely is not.
- Layout
- Not private or accessible on my visit; exact room and fixture counts were not recorded in the caption.
- Capacity
- I didn’t record an exact restroom or fixture count in this review.
Jesus.
Not clean. Not accessible. Not private. Bare-minimum amenities.
1/10.
One of the lowest scores I can give.
But let’s be fair.
You don’t walk into The Old Miami expecting marble countertops, artisanal hand soap and a restroom attendant offering you mouthwash.
This is a dive bar.
A real one.
The Shooki may be rough as hell.
The bar absolutely is not.